The idea of working interculturally is not going away. Businesses are becoming more and more international and cross-cultural office spaces are the new norm. You might have business partners in just one other European country or spread all over the world. Either way, it is important to start learning the basics of intercultural communication.

The topic of writing interculturally sensitive emails frequently poses some difficulty in my seminars. Perhaps it’s because where I teach in Bavaria some folks are known to be ornery about change and doing things differently (phrases such as “what the farmer doesn’t know, he doesn’t eat” – “was der Bauer nicht kennt, frisst er nicht”, are common place). However, change is something that many people have trouble dealing with, so maybe it’s a general problem and my students just aren’t the subtlest bunch.

Nearly every year we do some practice on writing more indirectly and politely, as Germans are often known for being blunt and far too “to the point”. I present my students with a set of very direct and frankly rude emails and ask them to rewrite each one using the phrases we’ve gone over beforehand. While some students take to the exercise well – often ones who have extensive international experience – others struggle and devolve into a “my way of writing is fine and everyone else is wrong” mentality.

Their point being that they should not have to write their emails differently, but that all the other cultures they deal with (USA, England, China…) should learn to put up with their German directness.

Now, they’re not totally wrong; they’re just missing the main point of the exercise. We shouldn’t totally change ourselves to make someone happy – enough self-help gurus have already told us this – but we should be flexible enough to make some changes where need be. See it as meeting in the middle rather than a total 180° turn.

After a few hours of practice, I don’t expect my students to be able to write perfectly crafted and polite emails like a native Englishman. I hope that they have learned a few skills they can put into practice when the going gets tough and their projects get thorny. I hope they can learn to be more subtle when subtlety is required. And I hope they have become more understanding of those other cultures – to try to communicate with others how they want to be communicated with.

Interculturality is mainly about understanding. Learning to understand other cultures and to communicate with others on their turf, in their words. You don’t have to be perfect at it, but if you approach the situation with understanding and compassion towards the differences between you, most people are more willing to work with you.

So, the next time you’re in an international situation, remember to bring that understanding to the table and see what happens.